Is Counselling right for you? 10 questions to ask yourself first
So, you’re considering seeing a counsellor. Perhaps your best friend suggested it, or perhaps you've been feeling a bit off lately, stressed, stuck, or just tired of overthinking everything. Therapy through counselling can be a game-changer, but before you dive in, it's worth asking yourself a few questions.
Counselling isn’t just for when life feels like a total mess; it’s also a great tool for personal growth, emotional resilience, and navigating life's twists and turns.
Whether you’re considering therapy for the first time or returning after a break, these 10 questions will help you figure out if you’re ready, what you need, and how to get the most out of the experience.
1. What’s bringing me here?
Is it stress, anxiety, burnout, relationship struggles, or something you can’t quite put your finger on? Knowing what’s pushing you towards therapy is a good starting point.
It’s okay if you don’t have a clear reason. Sometimes, we just feel like we need to talk. And that’s valid. Counselling isn’t just for crisis management; it’s also about self-improvement, emotional maintenance, and, let’s be honest, avoiding sending cryptic texts to your ex at 2am in the morning.
2. Am I ready to be honest?
Counselling works best when you’re open and honest, not just with your counsellor but with yourself. If you find yourself saying, “I’m fine; it’s just everyone else who’s the problem," maybe it’s time to dig a little deeper.
Counselling provides a safe space to be real about what’s going on. You don't need to possess all the answers, but a willingness to be honest, even when it's uncomfortable, can make a significant difference.
3. Do I actually have the time?
I get it! Life is busy. Between work, socialising (or actively avoiding socialising), and binge-watching that series, fitting in therapy can feel like another commitment.
But think of it like the gym for your mental health. You wouldn’t (or maybe you would) expect six-pack abs after one sit-up, so why expect instant emotional breakthroughs? Therapy takes consistency. Can you set aside an hour each fortnight for yourself? If not, is there something in your life taking up space that shouldn’t be?
4. Am I looking for a quick fix?
If you expect a therapist to hand you a magic solution in session one, you might be disappointed. Counselling isn’t like ordering a burger; it’s more like slow-cooked soul food. The real work happens outside the session, in the choices you make and the insights you apply.
If you’re willing to commit to the process, therapy can be life-changing. But if you’re looking for a ‘one-and-done’ solution, you might want to adjust your expectations.
“Counselling isn’t like ordering a burger; it’s more like slow-cooked soul food.”
5. What type of therapy might suit me?
Not all therapy is the same. Some approaches focus on deep dives into your past (hello, childhood memories), while others are more action-orientated, helping you tackle present challenges with practical strategies.
If you identify as a gay or queer man, seeking a therapist who comprehends LGBTQ+ issues could be beneficial, as it eliminates the need for you to explain everything from the beginning. If you’re dealing with masculinity, burnout, or relationship challenges, finding someone experienced in men’s mental health can be a game-changer.
At Bent Couch, we get that therapy needs to feel relevant to you. Finding the right fit is like dating, without the awkward small talk.
6. What’s my budget?
Let’s be real—therapy is an investment. We certainly understand that finances can often be stretched, but think of it this way: If you’re spending more on weekend drinks or impulse buys than on your mental well-being, it might be time for a financial reshuffle. Your mind deserves as much care as your car, your body, or your skincare routine.
7. Am I ready to talk about things I’ve avoided?
Spoiler alert: Therapy might bring up things you’ve conveniently ignored for years. If you’ve been pushing stuff down (like that time in Year 9 when you got ghosted before ghosting was even a thing), it may resurface.
And that’s okay. A good therapist won’t force you to open up before you’re ready, but be prepared to face some truths. Growth comes from looking at the tough stuff, not just skimming the surface.
8. Am I ready to change?
Counselling isn’t just about venting; it’s about shifting perspectives and making changes. If you want things to improve but aren’t willing to put in the work (aka doing things differently), you might hit a roadblock.
That doesn’t mean you have to overhaul your life overnight. Small steps, like setting boundaries, challenging negative thoughts, or taking a few deep breaths before reacting, can create huge changes. Are you open to that?
9. What do I expect from my counsellor?
Do you want someone who listens without judgement? Someone who challenges your thinking? Someone who gives homework? Therapy styles vary. Some therapists are more direct (“Let’s unpack that”), while others guide you gently.
If you’ve had therapy before and it didn’t work, ask yourself why. Was it the therapist, the timing, or were you just not ready? Knowing what you want from a counsellor helps you find the right match.
10. What’s the worst that could happen?
Seriously, what’s the worst outcome of giving counselling a go? You spend an hour talking about yourself (which, let’s be honest, can be quite enjoyable), gain some insights, and maybe even laugh a little.
The best outcome? You find support, clarity, and strategies to improve your life. You learn how to navigate challenges without feeling overwhelmed. You feel lighter, stronger, and more connected to yourself.
Seems like a pretty decent deal, right?
Seeking therapy through counselling doesn’t mean you’re broken; it means you care enough about yourself to invest in your well-being.
If any of these questions resonated with you, it might be time to take the next step.
At Bent Couch, we offer LGBTQ+ and men’s counselling that’s non-judgemental, relatable, and tailored to your needs. Whether you’re dealing with burnout, relationships, anxiety, or just want to check in with yourself, we’re here to help.
Ready to start? Book a free discovery call today and see if therapy is the right fit for you.
Shaun
